Glenn Siegmund is a Webster, Massachusetts, native and former CIO and IT professional with over 30 years of experience. Why on earth has he recently acquired Joe Coffee in Provincetown with longtime friends Mark Shaw and Peter McBrien? Is this an elaborate ploy to improve his dating prospects or are they teaming up to bring the most addictive year-round coffee experience to the Cape? Let’s bother him with delightful questions. 

Kevin: Do you recall your first queer experience with coffee?

Glenn: I was a huge Janet Jackson fan. She was touting the benefits of coffee enemas and their ability to expel sad cells. I had my first queer date that same night and decided to kill two birds with one stone. I got rid of my sad cells and prepped for my date just in case the chemistry was right. It was euphoric. Although the next time I stuck with drinking it as half and half with added sweetener. It proved messy.

Who are the three queers behind the recently launched Joe Coffee in Provincetown and how did they get enough time off from work to pursue this venture?

We are Mark, Peter, and Glenn, collectively known as MPG – Miles Per Gallon. Our distinctive small-batch locally-roasted coffee is sourced from Indigo Roasters, which is owned by “our sisters” in the community of Northampton. 

We have been friends for 30 years. Me and Mark retired from corporate America, where we were IT leaders. We are the same age but four days apart. Peter is the youngest and still works at a large insurance company as a VP. He supports our Rose Kennedy and vaping habits.

Is Alexis Glenda your nickname?

Well sometimes it’s Glenda when I’m in a good place. When I’m demanding, it’s Alexis. 

Who bestowed you with these titles?

We loved “Dynasty” in its day. Years ago when I was being demanding over cocktails, Mark said “Okay, Alexis!” and Peter burst out laughing. He commented that I was both Glenda and Alexis. As a Gemini, I have a good twin and a bad twin.

I snapped back, “Mark you are a fake Fallon  –  nice and sweet but playing people behind the scenes. And Peter, you are Sammy Jo. Cocktails, cigarettes, and men all night.”

Does the business of coffee change in a highly seasonal and LGBTQ-centric town? Is Joe Coffee doing anything different?

Yes. In a highly seasonal vacation sort of resort town one has to understand the visitors’ hopes and vacation needs and the needs of full-time residents and workers. The main push is the high season. July and August are balls to the wall. The typical line is 20 to 25 people deep all day. We must provide an awesome experience for those happy faces on vacation while taking care of local friends and coworkers who may be just as tired as we are. The locals and second-home owners are the ones who keep us in business the other seven months we are open. They are equally important. 

Our focus for the 2019 season was to create a friendly experience that provides quality coffee and baked goods. Our baked items are all made from scratch in-house and our coffee beans are roasted weekly in smaller batches on Mondays and shipped to us on Tuesdays. We grind our coffee for brewing to ensure the highest quality.

I’ve heard Ptown can be a bit depressing if you’re a single gay man who’s already had his bike stolen. Is Joe’s the new playground for meeting a potential partner?

Never leave your bike around town with the seat off. It’s certain to be stolen in this gay man’s playground and parked near the dick dock. But, yes! Joe Coffee now has 66 patio seats up from 20 to 25 in years past. It’s a virtual meat market with no alcohol where you can flash a smile, share a piece of carrot cake, or take a sip of a younger guy or daddy’s latte. It’s the place to go  –  on Joe’s seaside patio! Grab yourself a new or at least a vacation spouse.

Is Joe Coffee tackling the affordable housing crisis in Provincetown as it affects the labor pool?

We are the new owners. This is our first season. We are focused on this being our first retail experience and learning and understanding the community, labor challenges, and customer needs. We have hired many full-time local residents who already have housing but we will engage more in the community as we grow. 

Will your dating life suffer tremendously from Provincetown’s notoriously demanding season work schedule?

I hope not. I’ve been single now for a while and am ready to go on a date. Ptown is an interesting place. It’s a vacation destination where people are coming to have fun for a week and not fall in love or date. But working on Joe’s patio all day should expose me to some hotties.